Your non-negotiables hold yourself accountable in eating disorder recovery. We explore more in this blog.
Throughout August, we are bringing you our #BeingBrave series, which shines a spotlight on those moments and experiences that demonstrate bravery.
Here at Orri, we explore with our clients the roles of their individual non-negotiables. These become key foundations in sustaining recovery boundaries, self-care and safety; which are vital to recognise and maintain, especially when taking recovery outside of Orri’s care.
The idea here is that on days that feel difficult, having your key non-negotiables to focus on, as opposed to everything you need to challenge in recovery, can aid feelings of overwhelm or uncertainty.
Meaning, you can be present with your friends whilst on the picnic, and you can also be spontaneous with your plans knowing that you will be ok. This can allow you to use your energy to keep going!
Eating disorder recovery is all about developing self-care practices that reflect your sense of self-worth and self-love. Non-negotiables define just this, except, they are not up for compromising. They are necessary, they are non-negotiable…
Beth, Orri’s Eating Disorder Dietitian, explains a little more:
“Non-negotiables” are behaviours and intentions that you know are a key part of sustaining your recovery that need to be in place even on your most challenging days.
They create a threshold that you know you cannot drop below, whilst leaving space for additional challenges that you may try to incorporate when you feel able to.”
Are you thinking of your own non-negotiables? If you need a little guidance, here are some examples:
- Including regular and consistent meals (sticking to the structure of your meal plan)
- Doing what feels right for you when engaging in diet talk
- Including all food groups at meals
- Being mindful when scrolling on social media (checking comparison)
- Attending planned therapy sessions
- Using your crisis/safety plan
Sticking to our non-negotiables requires bravery, as they can help us to hold ourselves accountable in recovery. When we know what our non-negotiables are, we can communicate this to our wider support network with the knowledge that everyone is on board and rooting for our recovery.
They help give us direction and adds a reassuring sense of certainty in our day-to-day.
Bravery here might be one small act that you commit to today. It may be that you have identified a non-negotiable and are planning to stick to it. Or, it may be that you Googled our services and are now reflecting on your relationship with food. However your bravery has shown up today, recognise that no matter ‘how small’ or wavering it may seem, it is still valid and worth recognising.
Remember, you are doing such hard work. Know that every day that you experience challenge, you are building resilience, and from every hardship comes an opportunity to learn, grow, get curious and investigate.
Are you a parent or carer?
If you are reading this as a friend, a loved one, a partner, or a family member of someone with an eating disorder, we want to acknowledge the journey you have been on alongside them.
You may have witnessed their tears, their struggles and their pain, all manifested by the eating disorder, but all the while, bearing witness to your own process.
Recognising that your loved one is struggling takes bravery. It is even braver to communicate your concerns to them or to a professional who can help. You may find the below blogs helpful:
“What can I do to support my friend in eating disorder recovery?”
Dear Parent and Carer of an Eating Disorder Sufferer – Guest Blogger
If you are concerned for a friend and wish to speak to someone, you can complete our form below or call our Admissions team today.
Starting recovery.
We understand that there’s no ‘right time’ to do recovery. However, summer is a perfect time to prioritise treatment – aka, prioritise ‘you’. This could be the summer you need to reset so you can enjoy future summers or autumn plans doing what feels right for you.
Ultimately, you deserve to live a life, recovered from an eating disorder. We can support and make this your reality.
Find out more about Orri’s Outpatient programme here. There is no waiting list for this programme, nor our day treatment.
