Regular Guest Blogger, Mollie, shares a special poem that captures her growth in eating disorder recovery, like ‘how a flower grows from that tiny seed’.
“Having an eating disorder for a very long time has kept me so hidden, so enclosed like a small seed just buried in the ground. I didn’t want to be seen and I was scared to live and just be in the world. Anorexia doesn’t allow you to live or grow or be seen. Being in the depth of my eating disorder I felt like I was the seed buried so deep in the dirt just in constant darkness. I was non- existent. But as I entered the recovery process and got better I was not that seed anymore. I was the flower.
Recovery to me felt like the journey of how the flower grows from that tiny seed. You need so much help and support along the way and you can’t do it alone. But at the end you’re a whole new person blossoming into a radiant flower with so much colour and life. Anorexia only keeps you as the seed and the journey of recovery allows you to become the flower.“
Mollie
There is this tiny seed in the ground, in the darkness.
All alone, wanting to burst through the dirt into the light, growing into a beautiful flower at the end of the journey.
Bit by bit, adding the water and care to grow day by day, getting stronger, finding its roots and path through the dirt, the darkness, releasing into the world of light.
So subtle.
So gentle.
With patience and time, growing day by day without realising,
The bud of the flower opens up,
bursting with strength, colour and delicacy,
Finding its place.
The softness of its intricate layers unfolding,
with beauty, innocence and life, fighting its way through the darkness To become a beautiful flower, Holding grace, love and joy Despite the journey to get there.
I am this small seed.
Needing the help to grow and find my strength to work my way through the darkness And blossom at the end.
The layers eventually peeling back
From the closed bud.
Leaving this full, open and radiant flower,
With color, beauty and happiness.
The freedom and belonging to be what it opened up to be.
Recovery is finding your way through the journey of growth to become that beautiful flower.
If you have felt inspired by this experience and wish to feature your own on our website, you can submit a Guest Blog for Orri here.
