As the darkness of November sets in, we are reminded of the importance of the quieter seasons in our lives. This month, we explore the theme of wintering, a concept beautifully articulated by Katherine May in her book of the same name. Wintering is not just a metaphor for the cold months; it’s an invitation to honour the times of rest, retreat, and introspection that are so essential, especially in the context of eating disorder recovery.
When we think about recovery, it’s easy to focus on the milestones – the moments of growth and progress that feel energising and fulfilling. However, what about the times when we feel stuck, fatigued, or overwhelmed? These “fallow” periods can be lonely and uncomfortable, often filled with the nagging voice of self-doubt or the eating disorder’s relentless criticism. The pressure to be constantly productive or to “get back on track” can make embracing stillness feel like a betrayal of our journey.
Yet, wintering teaches us that these periods of introspection and rest are not only valid; they are vital. Much like nature takes a break to regenerate and prepare for the blossoming spring, we, too, can use this time to reflect and recharge. Accepting that it’s okay to slow down allows us to confront our feelings without the constant push to escape or numb them through distractions.
The Voice of the Eating Disorder
For many, the eating disorder voice can be particularly loud during these quiet moments. It might whisper, “You shouldn’t be resting right now. There’s so much to do!” or “If you stop pushing, you’ll lose control.” These thoughts can be paralysing, making it feel impossible to turn toward our pain instead of away from it. However, acknowledging this voice is the first step toward quieting it. We can start to see it for what it is—a part of us that’s scared, rather than a truth that we must obey.
Embracing wintering means recognising that rest is not synonymous with failure. In fact, it is a powerful act of self-compassion. During these times, we can allow ourselves to feel, to grieve, and to simply be. When we sit with our discomfort instead of running from it, we often discover that it loses its power over us. By honouring our need for rest, we begin to cultivate a more compassionate relationship with ourselves.
Finding Nourishment in Stillness
In this spirit of wintering, consider incorporating small rituals into your routine that foster a sense of comfort and self-acceptance. It might be as simple as curling up with a good book, sipping warm tea, or journaling your thoughts and feelings without judgment. These practices allow us to nourish our minds and bodies during difficult times, creating a safe space to process our emotions.
When we think of recovery as cyclical rather than linear, we embrace the natural ebb and flow of healing. Just as winter is followed by spring, our quieter seasons will inevitably give way to renewal and growth. Each moment spent resting is a moment spent preparing for what comes next—new insights, strength, and perhaps a deeper understanding of our own needs.
In Conclusion
This November, let’s embrace the concept of wintering as we navigate the complexities of eating disorder recovery. Remember that your journey includes not only the bright moments of success but also the essential times of stillness. Allow yourself to slow down, to breathe, and to find nourishment in this season of rest. Healing is not a race; it’s a journey that unfolds in its own time, and every season has something valuable to offer.
In the hushed beauty of winter, we can find strength, comfort, and hope for the seasons to come.
